Jimmy Fallon (on the ship blocking the Suez Canal): “If you look closely, the ship has a tiny bumper sticker that says ‘student driver’ … I mean, do you know how stressful it is to parallel-park when there’s someone behind you? Imagine blocking a whole hemisphere.”
Seth Meyers: “During his press conference, President Biden said he supports changing the rules of the filibuster to require senators to stand and speak, like it was when he was in the Senate, quote, ‘120 years ago.’ Now, obviously he misspoke — 120 years ago, he was still in college.”
Jimmy Fallon: “There were a lot of questions today about immigration after Biden announced that Vice President Harris will be overseeing the challenges at the U.S.-Mexico border. It’s similar to how Trump put Pence in charge of handling the pandemic. When the going get tough, presidents are like, ‘You got this, right?’”